The Birth of a New Sensitivity to Energy - Dr Richard Moss Interview by David Rivers
So, I already knew how to see and sense and feel energy fields. I had been aware of energy – I had been taught about that, for a few years, through another teacher of mine, Brugh Joy. I could sense energy fields. I could scan the body for abnormalities in energy fields. I was aware of that. But I didn’t understand what it was like to be one with everything, connected with everything. After that butterfly experience, the energy awareness was even stronger. I could feel people’s minds move. I could not read their minds, but it seemed that what I said was an extension of what they were thinking.
I also saw that when I was the most vulnerable and my heart was broken open, and I reached toward where the other was, to acknowledge to them where they were, that it had an incredibly profound effect upon people… that it literally just opened their hearts. They fell in love. And so they began to study with me.
But it only worked that way if I was not involved with me. If I was afraid for me, if I was worried about me, if I wanted attention on me, if I wanted to place the emphasis on my process, and how disturbing it was and how difficult it was, then people were willing to listen and people were very interested, but the actual effect of what it awakened in me was not transferred to another.
One time I looked at a woman who was a secretary at a place where this “wise woman” friend of mine did some of her work and as I was walking past her, I suddenly realized how much work she did. I looked at her and I said, “Oh, man! You save her a lot, you answer the phone, you’re an intermediary with so many people, and you really go unseen most of the time,” and she just started to cry. I saw her a few weeks later when I was doing some sort of a weekend talk, because I had already begun to do a little bit of teaching, and she told me that she was just so flooded by love at the time that she didn’t know what had happened to her. And she thought it had come from me. I told her that it was the same love in her that was in me. These are some of the elements of that experience.
I’ve written about walking to the edge of the cliffs where this woman’s home was, the day after the butterfly landed on my forehead, and looking down and seeing a whale swimming in relatively shallow water. I could also see a boat, which was a whale-watching boat, about another hundred yards or so offshore from this whale, and I could see where the wake had come, all the way from the horizon straight in to that point, at that cliff, which was very near the house where I’d had the black butterfly experience. And I had the distinct feeling that the whale had been attracted by the consciousness I had entered. It occurred to me that cetaceans, perhaps because they don't have prehensile hands for “doing,” are so very much in unitive consciousness—or what we human beings experience as unitive consciousness – that they recognize that consciousness. And maybe they even hold that consciousness on the planet for us, to some extent, and help enable our recognition of that consciousness. I just had the feeling that that creature, that being, had come to meet me – come as close as it could – to meet me. And that I had come to meet it.
I felt kindred-ness with life. I felt, as I walked past homes, the happiness and the unhappiness – mostly unhappiness—in almost all of them. I felt the incredible suffocation of women within their worlds, and the conflict of relationship. I just felt it – I sensed it. I knew it was hiding, but surely there, in so much of our world. I could feel it, just going down the street. I’d pass in front of a house, and I’d feel pain. I’d go in front of another house and I’d feel a different kind of pain, or a similar pain, and I’d walk past a house and I could almost hear the people fighting. I didn’t know these people and I suppose I could write it off as simply projection, my projections on them. But in any case, it was a paranormal sensitivity, and it was very hard to live with for a long time. Certain places were especially difficult: airports were difficult, driving a car was difficult for me; I spent a lot of time walking, for hours at a time and this was true for several years.
Primarily in nature. I also used to go along the roads, picking up litter, just to give myself something to do that was of service and at the same time keep me outdoors. I didn’t go on roads that had a lot of traffic and were smelly. But you know, just the two-way roads, and the hills of Berkeley and Oakland. I learned to find my way back to the inner stillness through my voice, through singing, through chanting…through prayer…through dancing… through walking… specifically through walking at a particular speed, which was walking at the exact speed that allowed the maximum sensitivity to everything around me, and to the space of myself. So, not walking to get to anywhere in particular, but just walking, and finding the speed where I was walking as my life. And all of those experiences, those early experiences, of going between the old “me” and the new me, became the basis of many of the activities that I use in my teaching.
Even though I’ve had that experience, and thought about it so many times, it’s so hard to speak about it accurately. I was really travelling in no man’s land at the time. Until the black butterfly, it was very frightening and afterwards I had a long period of feeling nearly overwhelmed a lot of the time. It has given me a great deal of empathy for the fear that we have of annihilation, which is an aspect of mystical awakening.